Dadventures

I don't claim to be a perfect dad but sometimes I do pretty well. The boys, being twins, have pretty much always been together. It really is a rare occasion when they are more than shouting, shoving, or sharing distance apart for more than a few minutes. When they're together they feed off of the emotional state of the other in remarkable ways. That feedback loop between them can send them into fits of silliness, fright, or bravery with very little prodding. But when you get them apart, they act differently. They are generally more calm, more pliable and more attentive. So I invented "DADventures^®". Basically, I take just one boy with me and we go out. I try to leave the word "No" at home and either accept their suggestions or gently redirect them. Usually it's done around dinner time so we might get something to eat, maybe stop at the store to buy a little treat and sometimes do some other activity.

For the first dadventure I took Cole and we headed out to dinner. I asked him what he wanted to eat and provided a list of possibilities. He chose hot dogs. We went to Wienerschitzel. I got him a kids meal that came with a horrible little book about some creature who lived in hot dog land. During dinner I asked him questions and really tried to listen and tried hard to respond positively to anything he asked or said. After dinner we hit Krispy Kreme for dessert. We returned home to find a very envious Grant playing games with Sue and Bryn.

That first night we gave the boys no warning that something different was happening. Grant was actually asleep when Cole and I left but the next night Grant had all day to build up anticipation for the dadventure. Every time he looked at Cole's little souvenir book the excitement grew. I called home as I left the office and he was down at the corner waiting for me when I turned onto our street. For dinner he chose Chicken McNuggets at McDonalds. His toy was a talking Alvin and the Chipmunks figurine which he could hardly wait to bring home to show off for Cole. While Cole is a little more reserved and needs some prodding to talk much, Grant pretty much fills up any little space in the conversation with whatever is on his mind. And believe me, that little boys has plenty on his mind. Just ask him.

Since those first two dadventures I've done about one a month with each boy. We've played mini-golf, been bowling, even gone to movies. Several times it's been more convenient (for Sue, anyway) for me to take both boys on a double dadventure. It has become somewhat traditional to stop at a store to allow them to choose a small toy ($5 goes a long way at the dollar store). One thing I've changed is being more proactive with their choices for dinner. Five Guys or Buffalo Wild Wings are more typical now. Hey, there's no reason I shouldn't enjoy the food, too.

I find that I enjoy the time as much as they do and I have to restrain myself so that our dadventures don't become too commonplace. Of course, soon Bryn is going to be old enough to go and my dadventuring opportunities will increase by 50%.

Excellent.